Not What It Seems Part 1

 9/25

So begins the centrepiece of this collection of caps. Thank you once again for all your lovely comments and support.

I think the first red flag that something wasn't quite right with Simon was the perfume. I mean, don't get me wrong, in the seven years we had been sharing a flat, women's perfume was hardly unetheral. We were both dapper young men, as unburdened by shyness as shackles of monogamy and as time passed many a female scent could be found radiating from crumpled shirts and well grooved sofa cushions. From the fun and fruity fragrances of our freshman beginnings to the more sophisticated spicy tones of post-grad conquests, we were more than used to the aromas of the fairer sex. But that was exactly the point, women's perfume usually indicates the presence of a woman, and Simon hadn't brought anyone home in weeks.

It wasn't odd for Simon to have a dry spell – it happens to the best of us, but it wasn't just the lack of female companionship, he seemed rather a bit...off. He would come back late and scuttle straight into his room, then leave first thing the next day without saying a word. I might have thought he was seeing a girl but he looked so dishevelled and twitchy. I don't mean like he grew a big Santa Claus beard or anything – he just looked pale, thin and tired. Then the packages started turning up.

Now, lots of parcels arriving isn't weird in itself, we abused Amazon Prime with the best of them, but Simon suddenly started getting stuff on a whole new level – weird ones too, not just the usual book or dvd shaped envelopes but loads of little ones and what were clearly bundled clothing. I didn't read too much into it. Simon is a grown man. If he wants to give his credit card a mauling, that's his prerogative. At least I didn't until I opened one of his packages my mistake. It happens sometimes, but this time was different. Inside, was a long blonde wig. Curiosity got the better of me and I opened his other parcels – a babydoll nightgown, lip gloss and high-heel shoes in a size that would fit an adult male. I didn't know what to do so I just shoved everything back in the boxes and hit them at the back of my closet. Ironic now that I think about it. However, Simon didn't seem to notice any missing parcels and the deliveries kept coming. The more boxes that arrived, the less I saw of Simon. He was by now spending all his time locked in his room and sneaking out when I wasn't around. I decided I had to intervene. One evening when I knew he was in, I made a loud fuss of leaving for the night and waited outside our front door. Sure enough, ten minutes later, Simon came sauntering out, only nothing like what I was expecting. He was dressed to the nines in women's clothing and makeup like some updated version of Brigitte Bardot. He saw me and froze.

“It's not what you think!” He stammered and tore away into the night, leaving me open-mouthed.

A few days later the crate arrived. By this point I was beyond confused. My best-friend for almost half my life was transforming before my eyes and I was at a total loss as to what was going on. I didn't care if Simon knew I was opening his packages any more and I levered the wooden lid from the container. Inside was a box sporting the image of a beautiful women and the words UltraReal bodysuits deluxe model 2020. I don't know why I decided to try on the bodysuit. Maybe it was an attempt to understand my friend's plight or maybe I just had an itch I didn't know I needed scratching, but I pulled off my clothes and tugged the super tight synthetic material over my skin. It took about ten minutes to get completely on but once it was in place, there was an intense sensation of being vacuum packed over my entire body. I looked into the nearest mirror and immediately regretted trying the suit. The face that stared back, while gorgeous, was not my own and the skin that covered mine was too realistic for my comfort. I had to get it off! I fumbled for the keypad at the base of my spine that had closed the suit, but nothing happened. I tried again. Same thing.

“Hello Simon,” a soft female voice purred in my head. “I see our new toy arrived. Play time!”